Tasha + Raef’s beautiful, intentional Humanist wedding ceremony at Gray’s Court, York
Surgeons Tasha + Raef wanted their wedding day to reflect their personalities, values and cultures - that’s Chinese, Indonesian, English, Japanese and a bit of Brazil! They are egalitarian, non-religious and deeply feminist, so we got on well…
Very much a team, Tasha + Raef spent their wedding morning together. They got dressed together and went for a coffee in their bridal finery, visiting their favourite hang out from when they were students in York. This meant that they were pretty relaxed by the time I arrived, and we were able to have our pre-wedding chat together - and looking out of the bridal suite window together, we talked through how the ceremony would work! It was great to have a bird’s eye view of Gray’s Court garden, where the wedding ceremony was taking place.
Tasha chose to enter her wedding alone, a symbol of her independence. She was then joined by both her parents, who walked her down the aisle. Equally honouring both the people who raised her was important to her as a feminist.
The couple’s friend Karim shared the reading, Marriage is not beautiful with us.
‘Marriage is ugly, you see the absolute worst in someone.
You see them when they’re mad, sad, being stubborn, when they’re so unlovable they make you scream.
But you also get to see them when they are laughing so hard that tears run down their face, and they can’t help but let out those weird gurgling noises.’
Karim was friends with both Tasha + Raef when they were at university, and he takes credit for encouraging them to get together!
After I shared their love story, Tasha + Raef read their personal vows to each other (and maybe got a little bit teary eyed)! Reel Weddings UK has captured a gorgeous video of this moment, which you can view on Instagram.
The handfasting ceremony involved both sets of parents, making visible the bonds made on this day. After ‘tying the knot’, Tasha and Raef triumphantly waved their handfasting ribbons around!
Confetti was thrown as Tasha + Raef left their wedding ceremony - a bonus of being outdoors!
After the wedding ceremony we enjoyed drinks in the garden at Gray’s Court, followed by a Chinese tea ceremony in the Sterne Room. We also had our likenesses painted by Melissa Bailey (and I was very excited to receive mine)!
Gray’s Court was a beautiful place to hold a wedding ceremony, and Helen and the team always look after guests so well. I was touched that they have since recommended me to other couples, and I look forward to returning soon.
The garden at Gray’s Court has a very special feeling; it’s in the heart of the city yet somehow secluded. It is edged by York City Walls, so tourists passing by were treated to a glimpse of the wedding (and some music)! I didn’t mind having an audience though - everyone is welcome!
Weddings are always a team effort, and I was fortunate to work with some wonderful people who all pulled together to create an effortlessly beautiful day:
Venue: Gray’s Court
Photography: Amy Faith Photography
Videography: Reel Weddings UK
Flowers: Willow & Bear
Music: String Theory
Artist: Melissa Bailey
